So I’m standing in line outside San Diego International Airport, waiting with about 200 other people to check my bag. The line, of course, has stretched outside the door and is winding its way down the sidewalk. As I am wont to do, I am reading everything I see. For instance, written on the very door through which my line passes: “The following items are illegal to carry into an airport… knives… guns… yadda… yadda… throwing stars… kubatons… any and all martial arts weapons…”

Wait a minute.

Kubatons?

Oops.

I happen to have said weapon in my pocket at this very moment. It is effective as both a key chain and self defense weapon. Not only that, I’ve forgotten to leave it home and it’s conveniently made of aluminum (hello metal detector!).

Fortunately, the very line that has given me the chance to learn of my mistake has provided me a solution. I can toss the only weapon I have left into my bag and check it through to Seattle. Now I feel naked. I’ve already left my knives at home, but now my last-ditch weapon is gone, too.